Thoughts & Feelings











{September 12, 2008}   How do u know if u Love Someone?!!

HOw Do u know if u love Someone or not ??

U may meet a lot of different persons in a lot of differnet times..U may Enjoy talking to different people..
U may Enjoyyy Listening to a lottt of persons..
U may also Love to Just sit with someone to talk for about 3 or 4 hours about differnet topics  in life …without feeling bored.
U may also meet someone new &  start to talk & then u feel as if u know this person from a long time ago!!!..it happens..huh?!!.
Also ,U might meet some one that u feel very comfortable with him/her when u talk with them…without even needing to be a close friend…just meeting her or talking to her makes u feel comfortable….it happens too…

From all those people u meet everyday….All those people u already Know..& People u might know later…..
How Can u tell if u really LOVE someone or not??…when I say Love I mean REAL love…I mean FALLING IN LOVE ..not just liking someone or feeling attracted to someone..

In every stage in my life ,I found that there is someone that I care about..or LEt’s say” I give my attention to him “…
BUT there wasn’t any stage that someone returned that attention the way I wanted it to be returned back…OR THere wasn’t any stage that someone started that caring or attention by himself ,most of the time it was because of me…because I like to be nice to people…I don’t Know if BEING NICE To People is a good thing or a Bad Thing…..It is logical that it is Good thing…Right?!!!
BUT it proved that sometimes it get one of 2  negative results:
1- is that people May get u wrong..& translate everything u say in a way they want.
2-people may get apart from u afraid of being comitted to u ..or even they become afraid that if they
treated u the same way u may get that wrong too.( specially boys…they are always afraid of being comitted….I don’t Know why?!!!….I think it is a good thing to be dedicated to someone…)

Anyways,Lets return to our Main Question,HOW HOW HOW ?!!!!! can u know that u love someone?!!!!
For Example,TODay,I met someone very special to me..(at least I guess he is!! )..it was a good coincidence..
we had a little talk & he told me he was leaving his job after sometime..That was a shock for me coz I became used of seeing him for 2 years now..we Don’t see each other eveyday of course or we don’t go out
alone..But I am in the same place he is working in..not working with him..But u can say we are in the same
Big Place..
That wasn’t not a good feeling for me…But still I didn’t tell him my opinion that I don’t want him to leave..
I know that If he Want to really leave nothing will stop him..Not Me or even the closest persons to him.
HE even don’t consider me special to him like I do..I am just I good friend to him( I GUESS!!)
I think I don’t love him..Coz I can’t love someone that I am just an OPTION in his life not a periority..
BUt WHY then I kept thinking about him leaving the place ..& thinking that I will not be able to see him often again..& kept hitting my mind again & again that it prevented me to sleep for some time!!!!!

I JUST DON’T KNOW?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 
N.B: IF someone ever read this..Plzzz I need ur opinions..Leave me even a 2 words comment on HOW COULD U KNOW U LOVE SOMEONE?!!

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I think you’ll ‘just know’. That’s not very helpful i know, but it’s not something you can define. It’s different for everybody. I’d certaintly say you’d have to be in a relationship with someone for a period of time before you can say you love them.

Sounds like you have a crush on this guy and you’re upset that you may never see him again? If you do like him, then get the ball rolling and hint at going out or meeting up with him and keeping in touch when he has left work?



gamb says:

First,Thanks Cynical for ur time& ur comment..I really appreciate it very much.
Second,what if he don’t like me??….what if He only treat me nice because I care about him & he just can’t treat me bad!!…
ORR may be I am attracted to him because he sometimes give me at least part of the attention I like..BUt another times ,he is just treating me like any other friend he know & may be less?!!



“What if he don’t like me??”

What if he does like you?! Look at the positives, what if he’s treating you nice cos he does like you? You’ll never know if you don’t ask.

If he says no, then what’s the worst that will happen? You’ll be embarrassed. It’s not the end of the world. I’ve been embarrased in that situation millions of times. It’s not nice but if you don’t do it then you’ll regret it. Be brave and ask him casually, you dont have to ask him to marry you! Don’t leave yourself thinking ‘what if’



gamb says:

U r Right:(…my problem is always Thinking More that acting …
But I may lose him as a friend if he know that I like him or I am attracted to him & I am just a friend to him…He is a very social person who have a lot of friends & most of them are girls?!!….if every girl he treat nice think that he likes her then it will be a problem I guess:)



Does he read this blog by any change? if yes then he could already know. I hope it wokrs out for you im sure it will



gamb says:

No Alex,he doesn’t even know about that blog:-(



Unkown says:

honestly i think u like the person………and i belive the liking or even loving a person doesnt always come equallyy…..meaning it happens when at first one person likes or even loves the person but the other person doesnt feel the same for that person at the time… RIGHT now its ur time….u gotta do somethin…..to show u like this person to try to make the connection



amanda says:

wow gamb you’re first post reminded me of my own self soo much. i might not have your answer you looking for but these past months ive had some interesting experience with being nice and taking chances. it may be a long post but it has a purpose at the end lol..

i was in a relationship for over two years, a long distance one, the type were u met someone and slowly feelings grew and grew and there were no denying it was love. it wasnt love in the begining but it was a good friendship. but as it developed from friends to best friends,it became love also. however the long distance side of things had a huge impact on me when i moved to uni (yes im at uni right now lol) and real life kicked in. i told him we needed to have time apart, go back to friends as it was too difficult for both of us.

during the time apart i met someone else..someone i didnt like at the begining becuase i never had that buzz for him. you know the feeling that shoots butterflies up ur tummy?!however as i was this person for a number of months i grew to like him, i grew to accept his kindness, his strength and i guess everything about him was so different. but every now and then i would think about my first bf, the way he spoke, they way he acted, the way we were. alot of times it caused great arguments because i couldn’t delete my ex from my life, he was a part of me, or maybe i should say he IS a part of me.

anyway, my relationship ended pretty back not too long ago and im now single. but my bigest question ive been askin myself throughout the break up is DO I REGRET THESE FEW MONTHS? and each time i would know the answer is NO. why? i took a plunge in the deep end of things. yes i lost one kind, wonderful person. but i built an even greater friendship with my first bf and he showed he’s willing to do anything to make me happy, even if it means letting me be with someone else. THAT i believe is REAL LOVE.

and the purpose of this really long post…TAKE A PLUNGE…whatever the out come is…its going to happen for a very good reason.



tia says:

hey dis storry of urs is soo like mine…my buh on ma side my (x)bf dumped me 4his x, buh whyl we wer datin i met dis guy who was n still is soo good to me buh i felt nufin as in love for him @dat time,all i felt was pitty so i made him a frend… he tries his best to impress me @ all tymz even tho i pushed him away many tymz n he’z nw found a new gurl.d fin is i now feel love 4diz guy but i feel itz late cuz he’z now datin. wha do i do guyz?



salma says:

hey
love means to care about someone wanting him missing him being happy to see him around .if u feal like this i think u love him but u just dont know the wrigth word which describes ur feeling whish is love.maybay ur afraid to go on on a real relation ship and thats why u cant see that u realy love him.go and tell this person that u love him even if his reaction was not good at least u will find out how does he feel about u even if his feeling is not as yours .love comes one time u can let it go or take it its ur choise so take the wrigth one.



gamb says:

thanks All guys for ur Replies,I really appreciated it too much & it really differed with me very much.:-)

I think the answer of most of u was that I Take the risk or Take The Plunge as amanda said & tell him how I feel…
It is not an easy action for me to take BUT I guess I will at least TRY..may be at first in an indirect way a little & then may be in a direct way..
Although we are 2 different characters,we somtimes agree with each other & sometimes we are totally the opposite..But i just feel that he had a great impact on my life in the 2 years I have known him.
I am afraid of losing him as a friend coz he is a very sociable person & he has a lot of friends & most of his friends are girls…So sometimes I feel as if I will not differ with him if he left or if we didn’t see each other again..



homelessgirl says:

I am going through something similar at the moment. I don’t believe in love at first sight or soul mates but I have met this guy who completely breaks that rule for me.
He is so similar to me in every way and I met him at a party a few months ago and just felt such a connection to him.
He has been calling me lately and I do think he feels the same way but the problem is he wants to move as well, to America for university and that saddens me because I don’t want to have a long distance relationship but on the other hand I don’t think I could live with myself knowing I let this person go.
I don’t believe I love them and I don’t think you truly love this person…yet. Because to love someone you need to know everything about that person good and bad and a deep soulful connection. It is a deep attraction and infatuation that will lead into true love. Anyway that’s what i think lol.
Oh and btw. Thanks for the comments on my blog, I loved them and I really like your site. And the video did help.
Thanks again xxxx



gamb says:

I am glad u like the video …& I am more glad that u visited my blog & liked it too:)

& thanks for ur nice comment too…it did help me a little..



queen says:

awwwww. i feel your pain hun! i really do. I wish I can help u but im going through similar situation and i ask the same question! lol I guess u never know until the guy tells u himself that he loves u and he will always b there for u and u feel the same about him. When you feel lonely and when u feel like your whole world has shattered then u call him up in the middle of the night and even at 2 am he gets up for u and talks to u and makes u feel safe and loved. when u talk to him he listens to u with open ears and open heart. i hope that helped. :D and don’t drive urself crazy over a guy that doesn’t appreciate u more. ;)



Monika says:

hi… I think u must admit ur love in front of the guy 100%..(This requires Guts and Truth) Even if his answer is “NO”, U will come to know about it and ur one side feelings would no longer gives u pains for a person who even dont know U/ur Emotions, It will give u a reason to forget him… Dont fear from losing a friend (i hope u know conversion frm friend->love is feasible but not vice versa…so anyways he is not “only afriend ” frm ur side atleast.).. So his presence will never make U comfortable either.. its better if u and he leaves n 4gets each other….

Believe me If He loves (deserves U) , He will never leave U else U celebrate ur freedom if he does so… Take care Dear bbye.



gamb says:

thanks monika for ur comment …I tottaly agree with ur opinion except in the small part about admitting it in front of him…although It may be right too …BUt I don’t feel That I have the guts to do it …or let me say “I am not that type of girls who can say it & admit it”…I hope I can forget him & that’t it…hope so



jake says:

wel its easy. do u stare at the person. are they all u think about wen ure not wiv them. do u read there txts ova n ova. wen u see them does your heart fill with hapiness and excitement.cn u imagine life without them. thats how i know. i luv my girlfriend wiv all my heart an id neva d anythin to hurt her. id b lost without u j.f x x x



DJC says:

Hey,
I kind of know what your going through. I was actially surfing google on “how to know if it’s love” and this site popped up. Haha.

Well basically here’s what my story was like.

I met this girl, wonderful girl at my school. We clicked at the beggining, and became best friends. Me and her were so similar, our thought processess were exactly the same, even our poetry seemed to echo eachothrts. Well I of course liked this girl already, and I really wanted to you know, ask her out to a casual date. The thing that prevented me from doing this was her current boyfriend, who at the time was a long distance relationship. I was her best friend, so I took it in stride like a good little boy. Haha. I just wanted to see her happy. Well, we got closer and closer over time, until we actually started holding hands and cuddling. I never had told her how I felt, because I was afraid. I didn’t want to rock the boat. Well her boyfriend ended up cheating on her, and she broke off the relationship. I thought to myself, I’ll give her some time. She just got out of a serious relationship. She probably wouldn’t be ready for another one. I was considering asking her to prom. A friend of mine, told me he wanted to ask her to prom. I encouraged him, thinking that she either wouldn’t say yes or take him on a pity date. I didn’t know that they would hit it off so quickly. I deginately regreted it, but in the end her happiness was all I cared about. I honestly was worried that he might replace me. I had such a great thing, and I was so afraid of losing it, but she reassured mr that I could never be replaced. One day, she came up to me and asked me, ” do you like me?” I said yes. I don’t lie to my friends. So she was a little worried about the ensuing awkwardness, but that passed. Everything was fine for a while. We all were pretty open about our “friendship” even her boyfriend was ok with us holding hands and cuddling. But one day… It just stopped. No more. I was a little upset of course. I had come to really like that part about us. I had never had a girlfriend before, so it was all new and exciting. Yeah, I’ve been a loner. She told me it made her question her loyalty to her boyfriend and she didn’t like it, so I understood and relinquished that part of our relationship. Like I said, her happiness is all that mattered. Well about three weeks ago we were talking and she asked me “if today was your last day, what would u say to me?” I was stumped. Because I knew with every fiber of my being that I loved her as a best friend, but I also loved her the other way. I took the plunge. She of course was a little emotionally unstable for a little bit. She said ” i’m so sorry, but I love my boyfriend. I love you, but only as my best friend.”
I said ” I know. And I understand that. I live you, so I’m going to do whatever I have to to make sure your happy. And being your best friend is what I need to do. ” we are still best friends. Even without all the extra stuff, I still love her. I’d rather her have the man of her dreams then risk her happiness and dating me. I don’t know if I can be the best thing for her. But maybe karma will wake up and give me a chance. Haha.

Well, I’m sorry for taking up so much space. Haha.
I guess my moral of the story is that if this person truly matters to you, then u should tell them. It takes a load off. And the worst thing that can happen is that the person doesn’t return those feelings. But look at me. I told her how I felt, and we are still great friends. Of course not every case is gonna end like this. But hey, at least in the end you’ll feel better.
Lol. I’m 15, have the best friend you can ever find, and I’m madly in love with her. Some would call this a bad situation, but I find it to be really calming. And who knows. Maybe someday down the road she might start feeling the same way about me. All I know is that we make each other happy, and if this is what it takes, then I’m all for it.

I’d do anything for her.

Ok I’m done. Thanx for your guys’ time.
And sorry for the somewhat meaningless story. I just kind of thouht it might be appropriate.



gamb says:

wow that’s a great post DJC, But Thank u for the sharing …
I don’t know what to say really …but I guess she feelssss very much what u feels but she is not sure because u didn’t say it frankly & of course as a consequence it is hard for her to say it too….I hope that ur situation can end up the way u hope for it:)
thanks again



teria says:

people cpuld think that someone is in love with u and u think that what are one happy thing that my best friend is i love with u



Tiffanie says:

I don’t know what to do i like two guys at my school. but my problem is my friend said me and one of these guys should date but me and him both said no because we didn’t like each other but after he started saying that and stuff i start to think what if and now i like him but im not sure if i like him because i like him or if i think i do.



maddy says:

i want to say her how much i love her….i love her more than myself i may not the one who love her the most but i know she is the one whom i love the most y u left me plss dont goo just hug me n see the warmth listen to my heart beats always take ur name just run through my dream n feel how much i care for u plss dont gooo i cant breathe wen u r angry its been 5 months u didnt talked me pls dont go u were my best friend but i dont know how i started loving u pls dont go i m not so bad……i love u the most i love u the last



gamb says:

Tell her that maddy ….Don’t just write it here in a blogpost that she may never see !…SHe may be waiting for these words From YOu for yearss !!
May be she is not able to tell u that..Coz she is a girl & may be she is not sure of what u feel for her …but she is tierd of waiting for u to say that & that’s why she left …
If u r that sureee of your feeling then u r the one controlling the way…U have two choices..either to tell her that & let her know!
OR u Just forget about her Simply Because u never told Her & She never knew how u really felt!
Wish u the best of luck =) & hope that she really finds out..



The answer lady says:

Love = Respect, admiration and awe at how how the other person’s personality in all aspects of life. Many confuse love with infatuation. It’s not about how cute he/she is or how fun it is to have a bf/gf.

As you get to know that person better and better are you in awe of how he treats others? How he conducts himself? Is he a man of his word? Bottom line again. When you look at all aspects of his life can you honestly say you are in awe and admire his actions and how he treats others?

Sadly some women dont even know what honour is or how honourable men behave



gamby says:

answer lady, u did ask me a very good question..& I guess my answer to that is No..I don’t admire every action he does.. sometimes I wish that he don’t do it this way & do it another way! We disagree on many things..BUt sometimes too he treats others better that he treats me ..He may say ohh ur a close friend & u don’t need that or do that for me!! while there are things that I need him to do for me, more than others.



do u know says:

no to be rude this is a close obsevation theres no such things as love this days we are living in a cold hearded world every one just want to have fun and put excuses to love like too young, not for me or are too scared to take it farther. its not like back in the days where every one dream to fall in. love is been fading away just like the big glaciers. but i wish every one out there goodluck with love and try to anilize it ur self first and the world before u can really love some one els



gamby says:

I agree with u on what u say …Love became a very rare thing these days Unfortinately:S

That’s what am trying to do now ..to analyze the situation to see if it is really worth it or not!..although a lot of people may say if u try to analyze it then It is not Love!



Dina albrecht says:

U know u love someone when u wish apon a star to turn back time and have them back. When all u ever wanted was the truth so u could fix things and life a better place for everyone invoulded.



Aw says:

I have a ? Ok so this girl i really like and wanted to know if she is flirting with me or what so were at the park and she keeps following me cuz she wants to talk and im kinda a wuss to talk to her she knows i like her but im not sure she is flirting with me or what. Shes a really nice girl and i really wanna be with her plz respond? What should i do



Aw says:

I have a ? Ok so this girl i really like and wanted to know if she is flirting with me or what so were at the park and she keeps following me cuz she wants to talk and im kinda a wuss to talk to her she knows i like her but im not sure she is flirting with me or what. Shes a really nice girl and i really wanna be with her plz respond?



gamby says:

@ Aw , I wish I could help you :), I am the one who needs advice here ..I made this post mainly to take advices & not to give ones.



cleo says:

When u love someone, let that person know how u feel coz he will never know how u feel and its not a nice feeling too love someone and he does not know it make u feel depressed so speak out and let he know everything of the best



anonymous says:

well i m a guy and i feel comited but the girl i love doesnt love me. i love her i know cause i fell a wierd sensation around her and i always think about her but she doesnt like me she is with my best friend. alo with the guy u like dont do anything stupid us guys like girls with a good atatude and that r there for us . i made a mistake i lost my happiness for her cause she liked another guy and for her to be happy i got them together



Philomena says:

Interesting :)



annie says:

I like this guy and we are goin out now for 4 moths but I had another guy before him and sum times I think ov me ex but I don’t no if I love him or my ex is that possable. he says he loves me but I’m not shure if I love him I realy do like him ps get bk soon.

WHAT SHOULD I DO



#TheRealist99# says:

I think u should try even if he doesn’t like you you will have a clear conscious



Ellie Simms says:

You know you love someone when suddenly your whole world revolves around the both of you.
For someone to love you or you to love them I think they have to feel the same way.
I screwed it up with someone just because I was insecure and couldn’t handle loving someone.
You have to trust them.



Ellie Simms says:

To be honest if you really do love him I dont think you would need advice. If he is leaving then you should just move on , obviously this guy doesnt deserve you or he would pay more attention to your needs…



Ayuba peter says:

The best thing to do to ther person is to let him/her know ther you care for him/her so ther him too will care for you in return.



You’re so interesting! I don’t believe I’ve read anything like that before. So good to find another person with original thoughts on this issue. Really.. thanks for starting this up. This web site is something that is needed on the internet, someone with a little originality!



gamby says:

Thanks “prescription glasses for men” for your comment ….Appreciate it very Muchh :)) & Happy you liked my post



Catherine says:

If you are not in a romantic relationship with him then it’s considered intense infatuation. It’s only when you are in a relationship for a long enough period of time to really know someone before you know you truly love him. To answer your question “How do you know if you love someone?” After knowing this person extremely well you look up to him with respect, admiration and awe in how he conducts himself as a man, citizen, bf and son. If you are just hung up on how pretty his eyes are or how charming he is or how cute he is it’s infatuation not real love. Though it does feel like love.

Good luck



gamby says:

Absolutly Truee Catherine! Thanks a lot for ur Helpful answer :)



chanchal says:

This world is very strange…its very rare that people we love , loves us back…
i feel strange when people talks about gettin started again..what i feel is that u can not love twice..love happens only ones in ur life time , rest are just compromises.. if u truely love someone then u can never get over her..as in my case i truely loved a gal but wat i got in return is loneliness .a simple misunderstanding n thats it n here i am stil trying to recover..i still couldn’t understand dat if she was so happy with me then how could she moveon.i tried movin on but couldn’t..n i keep writing for her as it makes me feel better..
“i wana go in my past..
i wanna go to that day when i.met u
i wanna stop myself from meeting u
i wana change somethin abt me
i just want myself back as i was
i wanna laugh as i used 2 in college , wid friends ,at home

as this is getting really hard for me”



gamby says:

I tottaly agree with u Chancal…Life is Really Strange ,Un-understood & Unfair Sometimes. As U said , Why could somebody that doesnt do anything except loving someone, end up alone & not happy?!! When All he wanted is to be happy & Make his partner Happy!
Again just unfair Life!



sam says:

if it is pure love and you cannot live without him



gamby says:

& how will you know Sam it is “Pure Love ” ? I guess that’s a harder question to answer :)!



thru ur affection wt d person u may gat tilo knwn, wot u find ursef doing doing byong ur imagination and more also d positive impact u both ve created for each others speaks alot about how much feeling u hve for each others



jide quadri says:

Love is feeling,what and how u feel for soneone



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